SPOILER ALERT:This story contains major spoilers for the Season 5 premiere ofJane the Virgin: "Chapter Eighty-Two." Avert your gaze if you haven't watched the episode yet.
Ah, friends, when we last left our Jane Gloriana Villanueva, she had just walked into an emotional trap. She expected her boyfriend Rafael Solano -- who is also the father of her accidentally artificially inseminated kid -- to propose. Instead, SURPRISE, he brought her face-to-face with her back-from-the-dead husband Michael Cordero.
Just like that, Jane the Virgin ended Season 4 with a loud thud of jaws dropping on the floor. Twitter went wild. Yes, even Jane has theorists now!
Several questions have been asked since: Where has Michael been for four years? Is it even the Michael we know and love? Did he just up and leave his happy home life? Sin Rostro has gotta be involved, right? Jane premiered Wednesday night on The CW for its fifth and final season, giving us a few of the answers we’ve been desperately longing for in an episode that journeys back to the beginning -- more on that in a minute.
SEE ALSO:Yup, 'Jane the Virgin' just gave fans the most shocking TV twist everThe episode picks up with Jane understandably passing out after laying eyes on her dead ex (?) husband. When she comes to, he tells her his story. We find out exactly what happened to Michael on the day he “died” after giving his LSAT exam back in Season 3.
Rose, aka the show’s looming villain Sin Rostro, kidnapped him after he was given tetrodotoxin to slow his heart rate. Some pretend EMT’s then shipped him away and bribed a morgue pathologist to sign a death certificate. As if this wasn’t enough, the poor guy was dropped off in the middle of Montana after his memory was wiped clean by giving him electroshock therapy. Whew.
The dramedy is channeling two supreme telenovela tropes in one go; a major character returning from the dead and he has amnesia. Michael now goes by Jason (after Bourne). He has a dog named Bo (he’s not a cat person anymore, poor Faith M. Whiskers!). And as Jane points out in an evocative monologue to her mom Xo and grandmother Alba, he talks slowly and uses the word ma’am. A lot.
But wait, are we sure it’s Michael (we’ll just call him that, even if he prefers Jason)? Yes, because Rafael confirmed it before he even got him to Miami by doing a DNA test. Michael didn't try to find out who he was this entire time after "some lady" told him to start over because he was in a whole lot of trouble.
This certainly doesn't seem like the whole story but it's the one we've got. The rest will probably unravel in a dramatic, slow fashion as the season progresses. The only sure fact is that Michael Cordero is back.
So, where does Jane the Virgin go from here?
I think it means we’re back to where started: smack dab in the middle of a sordid love triangle.
The premiere ended with Jane agreeing to help Michael revive his memories. She also goes to a relieved Rafael’s workplace to tell him she loves him and wants to still move in with him. This scene is very reminiscent -- down to the color of Jane’s dress -- of the series premiere when Jane went to Michael’s police station to propose.
Left:Jane and Michael in Season 1Credit: CWRight:Jane and Rafael in Season 5Credit: CWI believe we’re in for more heavy debates between #TeamMichael and #TeamRafael, especially once Michael’s memories come back. Let’s face it, that’s probably happening sooner rather than later, it is the last season after all.
Another great callback in the Season 5 premiere to the pilot is the opening scene. We get a glimpse of Michael's funeral where Jane was unable to read her prepared speech (too many tears!). Rafael stepped up and read it for her. The speech heavily mimics the words Jane used when she proposed to Michael in Season 1's first episode.
This is just another sign we're going full circle before the end but only this time, our characters have matured. With only 17 episodes to go, I hope we don't see selfless, evolved Rafael spiral out of jealousy yet again or Jane in a dilemma about who to pick -- it's valid but we've lived through too many episodes of it already.
In an interview previewing the new season, show creator Jennie Snyder Urman said we'll be getting more weddings and deaths, but most importantly, she wants closure. She doesn't want the the final chapter to end with the words "to be continued." Yes, Jennie, same!
Until we reach that point, let's just happily weep that Jane the Virgin is back in all its soapy, emotional, funny glory.
Jane the Virgin Season 5 airs every Wednesday on The CW.
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SEE ALSO:Yup, 'Jane the Virgin' just gave fans the most shocking TV twist ever